casually avoiding death
omfg, i can’t stop laughing
1st Car: WHAT THE FUCK?!
2nd Car: Holy Shit! What are the chances…
3rd Car: Yeah I saw that coming.
4th Car: Fuck you guys, I’m going home.
johnandsherlockunderthemisoltoe:
Do you ever wonder how drastically different your life would be if that one thing hadn’t occurred?
well first of all I’d probably have a life
“I have no plans but I sense an opening.”
you’re not doing it right by michael ian black
“Laughing at nothing and occasionally stopping dead in your tracks.”
Ahahaha sounds pretty accurate, actually.
“Thin & Crispy dough base, medium and large only” - Dominoes Pizza Menu
look all my books are at home and that was the closest thing ok
“resulting force affiliated with the distributed load” .. who ever thinks fluid mechanics couldn’t be sexual was wrong, apparently
I have two poetry books beside me, Bishop being the first poet in both, and the two results being equally hilarious:
1) “The boats are dry, the pilings dry as matches”
2) “Until everything was rainbow, rainbow, rainbow!”
UM draw your own conclusions
“His class wants to keep the country at war for its own interest, a traditional Radical charge.” K.
“But there is no bodies. That is a myth”
(and rest, my love)
If he be taken, he shall never more.
I can’t even pretend that sounds accurate. Gotta love Shakespeare.
“After that, we link up several segments and cover them with plastic braided mesh, like the screen on your window.”
O.O Popular science… Sounds quite kinky out of context though….. Just…..
“I shook my head and held up five.”
Am I bargaining with a prostitute in my near future? wth it was a children’s book.
“Forgive me, but I’m not sure how…
In 1947 (or possibly as early as 1945), Arabs living in the Judean desert of Jordan near the northwest shore of the Dead Sea found the first of a number of ancient scrolls hidden in caves in the cliffs just west of the marl terrace that overlooks the sea.
In a frontier community they are usually scarce; besides, my father was so often embroiled in some spectacular battle for human rights or perhaps sitting out his fines in jail—a background apparently not considered the best by the local members of growing girls.
OR
“Then I’d better hang up and start reading.”
“We’ll have a great deal more to say about thinking and emotions in chapter Four.”
“We have made a precise prediction for the amount by which a little clock traveling at speed actually slows down relative to a clock standing still.”
